


Are Super Fights Collateral Part of Our Health Plan?

by Pathologies



Category: Mao Mao: Heroes of Pure Heart (Cartoon), OK K.O.! Let's Be Heroes
Genre: Crossover, Gen, M/M, Waiting Rooms, baby fights, baby knife fights, badgermao and voxman are disaster parents, but didnt wanna turn this into a 500 tag ordeal, cameos by other characters from other cn shows, even more baby parents, inspired by a the old cartoon network city bumpers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-26
Updated: 2019-11-26
Packaged: 2021-02-26 07:14:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,126
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21569737
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pathologies/pseuds/Pathologies
Summary: Mao Mao and Badgerclops just wanted to take Adorabat to the doctor's. That won't be so simple.
Relationships: Badgerclops/Mao Mao Mao, Lord Boxman/Professor Venomous
Comments: 4
Kudos: 70





	Are Super Fights Collateral Part of Our Health Plan?

Muzak piped from the waiting room ceiling as Mao Mao thumbed through one of the magazines while Badgerclops had already drifted off to a heavy snore, leaning against the feline. Mao Mao held him up with one hand as he thumbed through a home and gardening magazine.

Adorabat let out a low piteous sigh, “Mao Mao, do I have to go for a check up? Badgerclops doesn’t go to the robot doctor!”

He sighed, tossing back the magazine, “Adorabat for the last time we don’t pay ridiculous premiums to the king so you can skip going the doctor! ...and yes Badgerclops goes to the robot doctor.”

“But I don’t wanna!”

“You’re already here,” groaned Mao Mao.

“Then I’m gonna learn uhhh...forging? Forgareringy?” her wing went up to her face mid thought.

“It’s forgery and—Badgerclops will you wake up and help me here?!” Mao Mao elbowed the cyborg awake.

Just as they spoke, another trio entered. Badgerclops ignored Mao Mao’s question to instantly gawk at the neon trio. He guffawed, “Hey Mao Mao, check out what walked in here. Total mess am I right?”

Fink, leashed to her boss/father Venomous, was practically dragging claw marks at the floor as the purple-haired villain walked on with a completely bored expression. The more squat Boxman tried to keep up with both of them, “I don’t get why Fink has to go to the doctor. I mean can’t you just do at home for free?! You know how much I hate public utilities!”

“Yeah,” Venomous said, thumbing at his phone, “But it’s good for our company’s image...plus you know, not really sure if Fink can get rabies. Never hurts to check.”

“Boss says I get a whoooooooole lotta ice cream if I get rabies!” Fink beamed.

“Can you focus on the problem with Adorabat?” growled Mao Mao to his Clops.

“Uhhhh yeah,” the badger searched for advice, “Adorabat, if you don’t get a check up, you’ll end up liiiiiike...that guy.” he pointed to Boxman.

“Really?!” beamed the little bat, “That’s so cool!”

Mao Mao tugged at his own ears, “That’s the OPPOSITE of what I asked!”

“I dunno man,” groaned Badgerclops, “Not my fault kids are always so weird and contrarian.”

“Maybe if YOU paid attention--” the cat roared.

But Badgerclops rebutted mid-sentence, “Oh ‘if I paid attention’?! Excuse me, who packs Adorabat’s food and game stuff?!”

“That’s for YOU!”

“AND ADORABAT! IT’S FOR BOTH OF US!” the badger rebutted.

Adorabat got bored with getting in between her two dads and the other people in the waiting room were a crotchety old man with a cap and a baby rabbit. That rabbit? It didn’t feel right, like someone intentionally made a baby version of something clearly not a baby and trying to pass it off as a baby. Even Adorabat could tell that was wrong.

She decided instead to mosey on what the little green rat child was doing. “Hey what are you up to? Are you bored too?”

Fink, tapping away at her handheld videosgame, sunk the device down to glower from her chair, “I’m playin’ Nunya.”

The bat beamed, “Oh is it like Yo?”

“No,” she felt a whip crack of air beside her head for that expert Yo Mama deflection, “But it’s a looooot like Updog.”

“How do you play Updog?” asked Adorabat.

“NOTHING, WHAT’S UP WITH—aw, you ruined it,” growled Fink. She spied the two furries arguing behind Adorabat’s back, “So what’s up with those guys?”

“Oh that’s Mao Mao and Badgerclops. They’re kind of like my dads! ...in a non-legally binding sense.”

Fink rubbed her nose, “Dads? Sounds lame. I got two bosses and they give me all the presents I want and I can do whatever I want.”

The bat murmured appreciatively. That did sound cool, “Well Mao Mao’s the sheriff, that makes ME sheriff too. And that means I’M the judge, jury, and executioner!” her voice grew dangerously low, “I decide who lives and who dies.”

A wave of jealousy seized Fink. This wouldn’t stand. She tossed her videos game aside to tug at Venomous’ lab coat, “Boss! Boooooooss!”

“Hmm?” he put down his phone.

“Make me sheriff! Make me sheriff! That big kitty lets batkid her be sheriff! I wanna be sheriff! I wanna decide who lives and who dies!”

Venomous pinched the bridge of his nose, “Oh boy.” Thinking Mao Mao would be a reasonable adult who would make things easier for him, he carried Fink over to the arguing furry adults, “Excuse me.”

“This is why we can’t share bed bunks! Your night breath is the wooorrrrrohhhhheythere.” Mao Mao smoothed back his ears, “Can I help you?”

“Sorry for this, but she’s really set on being sheriff, so could you make a pretend sheriff badge and give it to her? Just to play with?” Venomous thought that sounded reasonable.

Mao Mao’s eye twitched, “No offense to your precious bundle of...rat.” he cleared his throat, “But my job is a REAL job and I can’t just give out the title of sheriff to anyone!”

“It’s just a badge for godssake,” groaned Venomous.

“No,” shushed the cat, “No no no no NO no! The sheriff’s badge, the badge of a hero, is not a toy. You think LAW, goodness, and the line between civilization and chaos? You think that’s a toy? Then YOU might as well be challenging me and the rest of society!”

“C’mon babe,” Badgerclops nudged the feline, “Just make a little sticky note badge!” He whispered to Venomous, “Sorry he’s like this...a lot.”

“Waaaaah!” Fink fake cried, “I don’t like the tiny cat man! He’s lame! He won’t give me a badge!”

“You don’t DESERVE a badge,” hollered Adorabat, “You don’t deserve the dust from my peg leg!”

“Sorry were you talking?” replied Fink, “I’m having a big girl talk, maybe you should hang out in the BABY corner where you belong!”  
  
“I am NOT a baby!” the bat cried out.

“Yeah, she’s not a baby!” Badgerclops said.

Fink sneered, “You’re both babies!”

The feline sheriff clenched his fist, “You tell that rodent to apologize to my protege and live-in boyfriend right now!”

“No,” scoffed Venomous, “She’s a kid. Both of you are adults…” his voice lowered, “in desperately need of couple’s counseling.”

“Oh yeah, like you’re an expert on stuff and stuff,” scoffed Badgerclops, holding back tears.

The professor grinned, “Not only did I successfully merge the biggest robot manufacturer near Gar’s Bodega with my own little scheme, but I also find the time to be a dad to her. AND his kids!” he called to Boxman, “Right?!”

“Wait what was that about robot and scheme--” but Mao Mao didn’t get to finish.

“What?!” Boxman snapped out of his...whatever to speak with his partner (in both senses), “What are you doing talking to those animals? They probably got rabies and--” his eye widened as he viewed that beautiful Badgerclops robotic arm. “Ohoho, look at this baby. Let me guess, an integrated CPU-nervous port?” He rapped at the badger’s metallic pec.

Badgerclops, a sucker for compliments, giggled, “Aww...well you know...it feels weird at first doing it with one hand, but eventually you kind of just build the muscle memory for it y’know? But you...golden skull plate with ruby red optics? Cla-ssy.”

“Aww you’re makin’ me blush~” Boxman gushed.

“What is happening.” Venomous said flatly.

“This happens a lot,” Mao Mao said, “UM excuse me, Badgerclops? They’re bullying Adorabat???!”

“I didn’t forget YEESH,” seethed the badger, “Soooo listen. You’re cool and all, so can’t you make your rat kid stop bullying our kid?”

“Pssh NO,” snorted Boxman, “All she has to do is take her stinkin’ check up! We got enough to worry about with three, maybe four lousy bots at home!”

“Aww come on--” the badger lost his train of thought, “Wait you have robots? Can I see them?”

“No,” snorted Boxman.

“You heard bossbox,” the rat stuck her tongue out, “I can do whatever I wanna!”

“When I’m done with you, you’ll skip the hospital right to the grave!” Adorabat glowered.

Fink made a nasty face, “Ooooh I’m scared, the widdle baby using gwon up words~”

The professor was growing tired of carrying his rat daughter. He undid her childproof harness, “I’m reasonable, I’ll give you fifteen seconds to give Fink a badge from the rest of your weeb gear and we can go back to our sets, pretend the whole thing didn’t happen.” he produced something clearly meant to be abused for bad, “Oooor I can feed her these glorbs and let her loose. Your choice...uh….”

“Mao Mao,” said Badgerclops.

“Ah of course,” Venomous said, “And you are?”

“Badgerclops, ‘sup?” he gave a peace sign.

“Pretty good, I’m Professor Venomous and this is my partner Lord Boxman. You know all this aside, it’s real encouraging to see guys like us going through what we’re going through y’know? Anyway, fifteen seconds.”

“I dunno dude,” Bagerclops said to his boyfriend, “Just give her a badge. That stuff looked like it was clearly meant for bad. And I don’t think those new Powerpuff Girls are gonna come back for a looooong time.”

However, the feline warrior had his teeth tightly clenched, “Were you listening to anything?! He called me a weeb!”

“So? I’m a weeb.” the badger shrugged.

Mao Mao drew his sword, “I’ll die before I give villains like you even a fake license of law!”

“Alright,” Venomous shrugged, “I tried.” He popped one glorb into the rat’s collar, “Go nuts kid.”

“AWRIGHT!” the rat cackled as purple energy came over her in a burst of edgyness. Safe to say that with Fink going off the ground she had gone turbo. “HAHAHA!”

Badgerclops clung to Mao Mao, “Aw man, you just had to piss off the only other gay couple who also had a flying kid!!!”

“Relax,” Adorabat beamed, “I got this.”

“Uh,” the feline warned, “Adorabat you clearly don’t got—ADORABAT WAIT!”

Somehow Adorabat had smuggled her own weapon: a knife just perfect for grabbing with one foot. She lunged at the flying punk rat, whose razor sharp claws clanged against the steel.

“Hey that’s cheating!” Fink complained.

Adorabat shot back, “The only winners are those with no enemies! I eat my enemies WITH CHOCOLATE MILK!”

The rat growled, leading the both of them in pitched armed-on-clawed combat. On one side watched a concerned Badgerclops and Mao Mao, on the other a very confident Venomous and Boxman. Fink tossed several chairs her way, though Adorabat easily dodged them being a winged rodent. Frustrated the rat tore out pieces of the drywall, projectile tossing huge pieces and shattering more of the waiting room. In retaliation Adorabat screamed, shattering the windows behind Fink. Babies cried, parents gathered their children and fled. One old man sat and grumbled, “Nope. Not gettin’ out of this chair.”

“I feel like we should do something.” Badgerclops said,, “You know, as parents.”

“Uhhhh…Adorabat!” the cat shouted to her, “Remember! Real heroes don’t kill! Only maim?”

“Okay!” the Sweetypie bat nodded with a smile before she felt clawed hands grab her and pin her to the wall. She struggled, but no way could Adorabat budge her knife further.

Fink guffawed, “AWHAHA! Got you now! Say nighty night, Adumbat!”

Just as she was going in for the swipe, the doctor’s door meekly opened to reveal a pink shark on a rolling chair, “Uhh….Fink? Fink Venomous?”

The purple villain rose, “Alright kid. Playtime’s over. Gotta visit the doc or no candy remember?”

Her edgelord energy dropped, along with the rest of the two kids to the floor. Fink griped, “Awww I almost had her!”

“Nuh uh!” Adorabat countered.

“Yeah huh! I woulda pulverized ya!”

“Nuh uh times your dads times INFINITY!” screeched Adorabat.

Venomous sighed, “Ok, tell you what...you can have your rematch with Adorabat anytime after the doctor’s, I’m sure they’d like that.”

“Uh NO,” Mao Mao growled.

Adorabat butted in, “Okay! We’re easy to find, we’re just on the edge of Pureheart Valley with the cool house overlooking everything!” She added, “It’ll be the last thing you see before you say goodbye to your daddies forever.”

“You’re on!” Fink beamed, “Aw wait, can we get candy first?”  
  
“Uhh sure,” he turned to Boxman as they headed in the door, “You hear that? Fink’s got a playdate.”

“A mortal enemy already, they grow up so fast.” Boxman wiped his eye.

Adorabat turned to a fuming yet completely befuddled badger and cat, “Do you think I could borrow some powerful weapons or ancient power things or power?”

“Uh first thing’s first,” Mao Mao added, “You are not bringing that to the dojo.”

“And definitely not the living room or kitchen,” Badgerclops added.


End file.
